That Dragon, Cancer – why did I get a refund


That Dragon, Cancer is a indie walking simulator about the short life and way too sudden departure of Joel, who died at only 5. It’s a heartbreaking, tough to digest story as you hear every detail from 2 doomed parents. Their child was dying. Their child is dead.

First and foremost, That Dragon, Cancer is not a game. It’s an experience. And, yes, I know this is the most cliché thing I could ever say about this game or any other, but, to be honest, it is also the truth. There’s nothing ‘gamey’ about it. You will only be required to click that mouse button a couple of times. And to listen carefully.

This might be too real. This is not Joel’s perspective, but his parents’. And you get to feel 2016-01-12_00032-1200x675the dread because you’re dealing with mature feelings and thoughts. You’re dealing with depression, worrying, despair, lack of power and control. What would you do if your child was dying and you couldn’t do anything to help him? I hope none of you reading this will ever find out. However, should you be curious about it, buy this game. Take a look. Die a bit inside. Play this and then wonder how Amy and Ryan, the creators of the game and also Joel’s parents, have managed to make it through without losing all their sanity.

In almost 2 hours of ‘gameplay’ you will be presented not only with the parents’ perspective, but you will also get to read and listen to other people’s similar experiences: cancer survivors, those who have lost their dear ones to the illness and those who lost the battle.

So what’s settled until now: That Dragon, Cancer is not a game. So don’t be like me and expect a playable experience because you are going to be disappointed. It’s not a lesson not_goodeither. You don’t really get to learn, you only get to observe. What’s there to learn? Maybe, should I go around the corner, this is the lesson: that you can never learn how to deal with death. Maybe you will accept it, in the end, or maybe it will drive you crazy. But there’s nothing that can teach you a ‘good’ approach. Because we’re human and we have feelings which are, most of the times, more powerful that our reason.

But how can I explain why did I request a refund for this game without sounding like a heartless bitch? Was I not touched by the story? Was I not moved by Ryan’s letters of despair? Did I not approve of Amy’s faith and hope?

Of course I was. I have a soft spot for tragedies, but that was not enough for me to want to keep the game in my library. Was it entertaining? No, of course not, but was it supposed to be entertaining? God, I hope not. Did I have fun ‘playing’ it? No. And, again, I’m pretty sure it was not intended to be so. Did it make me feel? Yes. But did it make me cry? No.

hand_printsThis felt incredibly wrong since the very beginning. It makes you feel like an intruder, as if you’re spying on someone’s life and I have never been so uncomfortable. And mostly because you this feeling, I did not find it to be an interesting experience.

I feel very selfish and soulless to say this, but it’s the truth. For me, this was not an interesting game. It is sad and cruel, but it did not make me cry or weep or be depressed. I said it will stay with you, and it will, but at a certain distance. It will be ‘those 2 parents who lost their son to cancer’.

That Dragon, Cancer is not something I will want to replay, nor is it something that I feel like I need in my Steam library. I gave it a try and it was enough for me. I don’t want to deal with their pain anymore.


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Gaming challenge day 6 – Most annoying character

Almost every game has an annoying character, that’s for sure. And some are purposefully put there to be annoying. But, instead of going for an endless hunt for secondary characters (yet again), I have managed to find the most annoying main character that I have ever played.

Désiré from Désiré


This character is so annoying that he makes the entire game an annoyance. I’m not sure if that was intended or not, but man, this game sucks ass.

Described as

“A poetic point-and-click adventure game in black and white. […]The game is, at its core, a critique of the modern world and of the perverting nature of a consumer, profit-obsessed society.”

This is just shit. It’s a wannabe deep look on the issues of the modern society, a criticism for superficiality and the human nature, feelings and religion.

Instead, it’s just bullshit thrown over a bowl of dicks. There’s nothing deep about this game. It just makes you sit through endless pretentious dialogue about politics, deviant sexuality, self loathing and what they think would be a journey for self discovery but it’s just uninteresting boredom.

Désiré is color-blind since childhood – this is the core of the game. He is constantly looking for things that would make him see colors. And they’re trying to include here love and self accomplishment and straining himself in a god-forgotten land, religion and other bullshit such as being kind to those around you.

But they’re trying so hard the game just becomes painfully boring and cliché, with absolutely nothing to actually catch your attention.

And Désiré – Désiré is just the most obnoxious main character I’ve played so far. He’s stupid and mean and a cry baby. He only thinks of himself and has no real feelings (no matter how hard the producers want to point out otherwise, it just doesn’t work). There is literally nothing pleasant about him, nothing that makes you feel for him. You can’t empathize with him, you can just hate him more and more with each chapter: from annoying kid to annoying young man and annoying adult. He doesn’t stand for himself and, when he does, it’s a disgrace.

Just play the game for yourself so you can see what I mean. But don’t tell me I didn’t warn you: it’s not worth the €5 price tag.

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Gaming challenge day 5: Game character you are most like (or wish you were)

Okay, fuckers. Let’s get one thing straight: a character you are most similar to and a character you wish you were similar to are two completely different things and you can’t just pair them up like so.  What the fuck is wrong with you and your thinking process?

Anyway, a game character I’m most similar to. Am I the only one that had issues with this question? Judging this from a realistic point of view, I would have to go through a long list of secondary characters to see which one was the most unhelpful.

But then I remembered. There’s a main character that doesn’t do any special shit. And she’s also a pretty unlikable one of you play her well. And that is

Alex from Oxenfree


I absolutely loved the game and I think it’s one of the most enjoyable things I’ve played lately. Because it’s a choice and consequence game, you somehow get to choose how you want Alex to be (and you even get achievements based on this) while also influencing the ending. I got a good one, probably the best ending, but that doesn’t mean Alex is worth much, in my opinion. She’s like the average of average, doesn’t have any special skill and is also mildly annoying – just like me.

(I swear to god, Rayz, if you’re here to comment on how annoying I am, I’m gonna fly up there and kick your ass)

Basically, she doesn’t want to do much, is pretty salty and throws shade at people, but she’s trying her best when the situation gets serious and takes responsibility when needed.

Still not that impressive.

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Summer 2017 want to watch

So what if I’m not done with Spring 2016?

So what if I mostly never actually watch what I initially said I would watch for the season?

So what if I’m just a piece of garbage?


Without further ado, here’s my Summer 2017 watching list. As usual, alphabetically.

Clione no Akari

Clione no Akari

Sick bullied orphan – this might be really good

School friends go to check up on here – might be going downhill

Summer festival in a nearby town – ok, this might end up being shit

Although it has a huge potential of being just another generic high school wannabe drama, it got my attention enough as to at least give it a try and see where things are going further. Maybe it’s not gonna be shit. Maybe it’s gonna be fine.



I no longer have hope of finding an anime series about gamers to also be tailored to my taste. (I will probably write a post about how The King’s Avatar deceived me and let me down). Nonetheless, if it has gamer characters, I’m in for a ride. Expectations not that high, tho’. I’m protecting myself from disappointment.

Hajimete no Gal

Hajimete no Gal

Yes, I know. This sounds like what I hate the most. High-school setting, high-school characters, high-school drama. But I’m a mere human and I find amusement in the idea of seeing how the relationship between a nerd and queen B might turn out. And please don’t tell me he’s gonna end up with a secret childhood friend who has always been in love with him.

Hitorijime My Hero

Hitorijime My Hero

Ruki’s second attempt at yaoi. The first one was a disastrous failure with Super Lovers. Although, a relationship between a teacher and a student? Do I smell some mild Boku no Pico?

Jigoku Shoujo Yoi no Togi

Jigoku Shoujo 2

No synopsis yet my ass. It’s the second season of Jigoku Shoujo. Although I wasn’t that impressed with the first season (I was all into Inuyasha and Yu Yu Hakusho 10 years ago), it was not an unpleasant watch. No reason for me not to pick up the sequel.

Netsuzou Trap

Netsuzou Trap

Ruki’s first attempt at yuri. I somehow associate this series with Scum’s Wish although I’m at least 87.3% sure they’re gonna be way too different. Hell, why wouldn’t I give it a try, tho’? It looks like I’m gonna have a lot of free time anyway.

New Game! 2

New Game 2

Yes, yes. I am aware of how much I complained about this series and how I said it’s a joke of a show. But I finished it, alright? And that doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy it one bit. It might not be the brightest bulb in the chandelier, but it was entertaining here and there. Entertaining enough as to make me try and watch the second season. And, with a little bit of luck, maybe Nenecchi will go die in a fire or something.

What about you, guys? What do you think about the upcoming season and what are you most excited for?


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Steam summer sale haul

The most annoying thing about the Steam summer sale is that it always starts and ends before I get paid. I mean, really, couldn’t you have waited a bit more so I can splurge without feeling bad?


Anywayz, I had to choose between either picking a lot of games that were dirt cheap even off sales or buy the more expensive ones that are easily affordable now. The answer was simple.

The haul also includes my boyfriend’s purchases ’cause we have the shared library thingie so we can play each other’s games.

My picks:


Portal 2

Time Gentleman, Please!

Ben There, Dan That!

The Wolf Among Us

Broken Sword 1: Director’s Cut

Broken Age

That Dragon, Cancer


Kathy Rain

Home is Where One Starts…

His lame-ass picks:

BioShock: The Collection

  • BioShock Remastered
  • BioShock 2 Remastered
  • BioShock 2: Minerva’s Den Remastered
  • BioShock Infinite
  • BioShock Infinte – Season Pass
  • BioShock Infinite: Columbia’s Finest

Borderlands 2 Game of the Year

  • Borderlands 2
  • Borderlands 2 – Captain Scarlett and her Pirate’s Booty
  • Borderlands 2 – Psycho Pack
  • Borderlands 2: Collector’s Edition Pack
  • Borderlands 2: Creature Slaughterdome
  • Borderlands 2: Mechromancer Pack
  • Borderlands 2: Mr. Torgue’s Campaign of Carnage
  • Borderlands 2: Sir Hammerlock’s Big Game Hunt
  • Borderlands 2: Tiny Tina’s Assault on Dragon Keep

As I’m not a big fan of AAA games, my games of choice are pretty affordable in general so I could afford holding back for now. Nonetheless, I’m most excited for Kathy Rain, That Dragon, Cancer, The Wolf Among Us and MURDERED: SOUL SUSPECT and I can’t. fucking. wait. to get. playing.

And maybe I’ll use this opportunity to try out BioShock to see what the hype is all about. You know, widen my horizons.

What about you? What did you pick up and what are you most hyped for?

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Gaming challenge day 4 – Your guilty pleasure game

Elementary, my dear Watson.


It’s fucking League of Legends. And, if you know me, you must have already known that.

Yes, this is a pleb answer. But I just can’t help it. I wasted too much of my life playing this shitty game and I don’t intend to stop anytime soon, even if I have managed to get myself on a healthier path (back in the days, I would even play LoL for 20+ hours a day)

There’s not much to be said about LoL, everyone knows the drill. As for random facts, I don’t play a shit ton of champions, I’m currently a support main slowly transitioning to mid laners and I’m fucking scared of Orianna.

I’m not the best player and I don’t claim to be (this is such a lie, I claim to be the very best like no one ever was and I sometimes make people call me Faker) – Platinum V atm.

My most played champion is Nami, but my favourite one is Rammus. And back in the days, when I was playing jungle and when Rammus was meta, I was pretty good with him. From time to time. Proof below.


No, I will not admit the fact that that match was played in fucking 2014.

And yes. There you have it. League of Legends is my guilty pleasure. I can play it for hours without moving. And it always gets me angry and frustrated. Sometimes, even if I’m winning. But heh, that’s life and the community is to be discussed in a different post, on a different day.

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TL;DR Thursday – Your Lie in April




  • Kaori Weird Bitch Miyazono
  • Kousei Mommy Issues Arima
  • Tsubaki Cockblock Sawabe
  • Ryouta Who the fuck are you Watari

TL;DR plot:

Mommy Issues can no longer play his music because he has some issues with his mommy, but Weird Bitch puts some life in him while she has none. They start playing together and want to bone each other but Cockblock blocks the cock. Who the fuck are you appears in some scenes and wants to be deep, but nobody cares.

TL;DR opinion:

“There’s water coming out of my eyes” – Ruki, 2017

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